Things I’ve Learned

Believe it or not, these are all serious things I’ve learned.

from danton

Yes, some are sappy, but fellas, sometimes I’m a sappy person.

1. Straightening the bedcovers makes any room look better.

from logankissinger

2. When on a trip, always bring more underwear than you think you need. Turning it inside out doesn’t always work.

from forumgarden

Just saying.

3. Tea isn’t just for the Brits. I routinely murder a cup of tea.

from andrewsullivan

3. Going to a mouth-gapingly horrible play with someone you love doesn’t make the play any better. But making fun of it on the drive home sure is fun.

from harvardtheatre

4. Routines aren’t always bad. Or a sign of boredom.

from brueggers

5. Save your leftover rice to make fried rice the next day. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, or snack time. Quickly.

from easychicken

This comes straight from the infinite wisdom of El Guapo.

6. Anybody can harmonize (or think they are) to bluegrass.

from shlotcbn

7. Gas heaters are dangerous. Ask my fried hair and scarred psyche.

from theinjurylawyers

8. I need at least 3 glasses of water and a chicken sandwich per gin drink that I imbibe now. This has not always been true.

from purseblog

9. Wine makes anything better. No sandwich needed.

from thumbpress

10. Domestic beers give me hangovers. One sip of Miller Lite and my whole next day is shot.

from asylum

11. The universe is like Twitter. You can’t expect to get something back until you’ve put something out there.

from chopra

12. It’s okay to let the dishes sit overnight, but they sure are worse the next morning.

from tellingsecrets

13. Pantene hairpsray is the second worst thing you can do to your hair (refer to #7 for the worst thing).

from imperialbeauty

14. Plant your own garden. Don’t wait on someone else to bring you flowers.

from workathome

That was a metaphor.

15. When you throw a party, hide the overflow of dirty dishes in the oven.

Nobody needs to know how your kitchen was a train wreck  25 minutes before the party started. And if there aren’t any dirty dishes, you look like an effortless host.

from sheknows

Win.

You’re right. I should have known #2 years ago, I didn’t believe #5 until I tried it, and #8 was learned the hard way.

But hey, now I know. And you do, too.

suck it, martha.

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Categories: Life, Tips

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